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Happy Thanksgiving to the Not Done Yet community.
I am so thankful to all of you who have subscribed to my newsletter. It’s an honor to share this space with you.
The holidays felt so far away — and then, boom, here they are.
We spent the week decorating our home (yes, before Thanksgiving, because I refuse to think about ornaments while juggling turkey, stuffing, and visiting family). I’ve cooked more than I’ve written these past few days. And, confession: I’ve used some of my writing time experimenting with press-on nails. No judging — they’re shockingly good now and don’t require 90 minutes of sitting in a manicurist’s chair.
But honestly, this week has been less about producing and more about paying attention.
Here’s the thing: I’m no longer chasing perfection during the holidays. I used to. Oh, I used to. Every ribbon straight, every schedule tight, every dish timed to the minute. But something I heard today landed in a new way:
Be present, not perfect.
I know it’s not a new line, but maybe it’s the guide I needed for this season — a reminder to slow down, look around, and let the moment be what it is.
I want to bake cookies with my sons and nephews without rushing. I am going to embrace the mess. I want to pick just a few events to go to as a family, instead of cramming in everything. I want evenings in my favorite chair, fire going, book open, nothing urgent calling my name. And I want to keep the little traditions that matter to my boys.
When I think back to my own childhood, it’s never the presents I remember. It’s the experiences: My parents driving my sisters and I around to see Christmas lights, singing carols in the car, staying up until midnight on Christmas Eve to open gifts, the late-night dinners with friends and family as we got older. Those moments left fingerprints on my memory in a way no store-bought gift ever could.
It’s easy to let stress invade the season. But if I could offer anything, it’s this: Decide what your goal is for the holidays, and choose intentionally. If there are people you want to spend time with, make them the priority. If you want to volunteer or help those in need, schedule it and protect that time. If it’s time to pass down holiday recipes you make every year, turn that into a tradition you share with your children — or your nieces and nephews.
So this year, my goal is simple:
Make sure there’s at least one moment each holiday season that becomes a memory for someone I love.
If we can manage that — even just one — then the season has done its job.
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